Clubbing - A debate

Music is a fabulous thing. I am one of those people who can ease a fantasy into any song to accompany me on a walk/bus journey/train ride and think it's a bit awesome to just let Shuffle do it's thing. Unless an Eiffel 95 song creeps in - I really need to go through my iTunes. The world can appear a lot more colourful with music in your ears which is why clubs do so well. Apart from the workout and the eyecandy - which, coincidentally, contradict each other in a lovely way. Sweaty from dancing + Trying to attract a mate rarely succeeds to = lasting relationship. Anyway, apart from that, clubs aren't nice places, they are smelly in new and fabulous ways since the smoking ban came into play and not just from the aforementioned drug/alcohol fueled workout sweat but also from the week-old spills and throw ups and the mix of colognes and perfumes which couldn't compliment each other if they tried. And they don't try. Then there's the drink prices - in London I have a mini heart attack whenever I order a drink, unless I'm in Wetherspoons, which I rarely find myself in nowadays, simply cos there are enough perves in London without actively seeking them out. Saying that, there is a nice one in Bromley, but it was only nice because of the eye candy. 

I need a new word for eye candy. Sight pleasers? Lookers? Lickables? 

Anyway. Third thing about clubs would be the bouncers. Bouncers, in my experience, are only nice if you work with them. Or they're that particular bouncer working a Dita Von Teese night I went to a while back, who lent me his snood in the middle of the night and his card at the end. Should really give him a google - which is the modern pre-empt to the phone call. Generally, though, bouncers are just a bit mean, and make you feel like a criminal drug addict when what you are is in fact a slightly intoxicated, very loud, quite giggly thespian with a mobile and no signal. Very, very different things. Worst of all about clubs is the toilets. 

Saying that, I bloody love them I do. And I will continue to party in a way that certainly isn't as romantic as a 1950's ballroom or a Salsa night but just as sexy and a little less co-ordinated. And I wouldn't have to wear heels.